More eye surgery

Let's get the good news out of the way first. I have a date for my eye surgery! It's 22nd of July so just 3 weeks away. I have to say that my consultant at Moorfield's has been great. He is hopeful that this surgery will be successful but if not there is another operation which can be performed so this isn't my only option.

I am relieved that the wait won't be too long, the thought of even another 3 weeks with my sight like this is bad enough. This whole experience has really given me a valuable insight into what it's like to an acquire an impairment. As I was born with mine I've only ever known being partially sighted. I've also always known that my sight is fairly stable. Even the initial problem they tried to fix with the surgery that lead to this, happened so gradually I had time to get used to it. But this sudden loss of sight is something else.

I never realised that if you can't see well enough to read an eye test chart or in my case last night see where the chart was with my left eye, there's another test they do! The nurse got a piece of card with a big black x on it and walked towards me. I couldn't see that either with my left eye. She then tried how many fingers am I holding up, her hand about 6 inches from my face. No I couldn't pass that either. All I can see out of my left eye at the moment is light & vague shadows. The light I do see causes such glare it's painful sometimes.

But at least my other eye can see better. The trouble is, it's not great either. Reading isn't easy, even huge size text isn't great. I can see it but somehow not clearly and the sense of what I'm reading is hard to grasp some how. I find that I have to limit computer use to about half an hour to 40 minutes a day. Any more and the glare and the reading difficulty sets off headaches. Reading food labels and cooking instructions is impossible in many cases. Crossing roads is hard and I'd not dare attempt it somewhere unfamiliar or without a pedestrian crossing. If Im in a busy place or even just in our local supermarket I dont see people to my left causing more than a few trolley collisions! Plus I've noticed that I'm just a bit more clumsy than usual.

I've tried to use different addictive technology on the computer but I'm struggling -I'm sure with time I'd master it but hopefully I won't need to.

This has really made me aware of how much I rely on the sight I have. I may be used to having impaired sight normally but I know how to live within that impaired vision. Now I feel like I'm having to learn how to do or not do lots of things again. I'm lucky that this should only be temporary. I've been surprised by how it has effected me emotionally. It has given me a better understanding and respect for those who lose their sight and the Emotional and practical issues and barriers they overcome.

Just a quick update. On the eye front, there has been little change in my left eye. In fact if anything its got worse. I really can't see anything out of it now, it's like looking through a steamed up mirror or heavily frosted glass. But I have been trying to get on with things. I have to pace myself if using the computer or trying to read anything. I can manage about half an hour but then I begin to get a head ache and my weak right eye just gets too tired. It is getting to the point where I sometimes don't notice that I can't see out of my left eye but in the evenings when I'm tired and particularly if I am trying to use the computer I notice it a lot.

Some good news is that I have an appointment to see my consultant next week so should know more in a weeks time. Hopefully this time next week I'll be letting you all know when I'll be having more surgery. I never thought I'd be so happy at the thought of surgery!

I am getting quite bored though as many of the things I'd usually do to fill my time just aren't feasible at the moment. Travelling is very difficult as I don't feel very confident especially crossing roads, reading of course is difficult, and using the computer. I have made excellent progress with the scarf I'm knitting myself though! I can knit with out looking closely at what I'm doing you see, unless I make a mistake!

One thing I can get on with is sorting out some of the unpacked boxes upstairs so we can get our spare bedrooms sorted out for July when we have parents visiting! I'll post some pictures when we get the rooms sorted. The middle bedroom has a stripy theme!

soup

To help me keep my mind off things, this afternoon I did some more baking and made some soup. There is a picture of the loaf above, I made it with organic malted strong flour. I let it prove once in the mixing bowl and then again in the bread tin, and baked it for 25 minutes.

I decided to make chorizo and broad bean soup. I took a picture of the vegetables below which are the base of the soup, because I thought the colours were pretty. In the pan are carrots, red pepper, broad beans, onion, and wet garlic. Later I added cherry tomatoes and chorizo then the stock. I pureed most of the soup but kept some beans and meat back to add to the soup once mixed.
The whole thing didn't take very long at all, as I cooked I listened to the radio.

Some good news

I am pleased to say that I do have some good news to report. But first I would like to thank everybody for their kind words and thoughts over the last couple of days.

My consultant got in touch with me yesterday evening, which was a very pleasant surprise. I know how busy consultants are but it was a real relief to hear from him. He is very surprised that this has happened to my eye, it's quite unusual to have the same problem twice. He is however hopeful that there is something that can be done. My appointment to see him is being brought forward, and after he has taken a look at my eye he will be able to decide what action to take. It will probably be more surgery, a similar operation to the one I had before. He is pretty certain that my eye can withstand another operation very soon.

So I am a lot more relieved than I was yesterday. Particularly as the doctor I saw at accident and emergency also spoke to my consultant yesterday, so as well as my report he also knows what the doctor observed on Monday. So it's just a matter of waiting for my new appointment to come through. I will give them a call at the hospital to make sure that the appointment has been rearranged, I'm not leaving anything to chance.

With everything that has happened after my eye surgery, I have forgotten to write on my blog about being an auntie again. My brother and his wife Sarah have had another little girl called Matilda or Tilly. I visited my brother on Sunday and got to see Tilly at eight days old. She is a very sleepy baby apparently sleeping through most of the night. Her three big sisters and big brother are really looking after her. Antonia had dressed Tilly, that morning all in pink! I got to hold her for about half an hour and she just slept, she has dark hair and I think looks like Sarah but sometimes like my brother as well.

Some bad news

Those of you who read my blog regularly, will know that just over two weeks ago I had surgery on my left eye. As I wrote earlier on my blog, initially the surgery was a success. The surgery was to remove old lens remnants and scar tissue left over from the operations I had as a baby to remove cataracts. Last Wednesday I visited my consultant, who was very pleased with my progress. Unfortunately over the weekend the vision in my left eye began to deteriorate. My eye became misty and then cloudy. At first I thought it may be a side-effect of the steroid eyedrops I had been taking. They can cause blurred vision and even tunnel vision so I decided I would call Moorfields Hospital on Monday morning. By Monday, however the cloudiness in my left eye had got worse to the point that I was unable to see clearly out of my eye.

So early on Monday morning we went down to Moorfields again. As ever I was seen very quickly at accident and emergency because I am an existing patient who has recently had an operation. After various tests including an ultrasound scan the doctor that I saw, confirmed that my vision is being affected by yet another piece of lens debris. It appears that as one piece of debris was removed another piece has moved into its place. This is giving me the symptoms of a cataract and this time quite a bad one.

If you imagine looking at a large clock then my left eye is completely cloudy from about five o'clock through to 12 the section between 12 and five is misty. There is a section at around seven o'clock towards the middle which is very cloudy to the extent that I can seem very very little through it. As it is worse at the bottom of my eye it is making it very difficult for me to read and to negotiate steps.

My left eye, the one affected is my best eye which means I am using my right eye which does not see as well. Except now my right eye is the only one I can see through. When I'm using the computer I have to enlarge everything much bigger. I'm also having to get used to not being able to see as much when just getting around generally.

Although it is very disappointing that this has happened, I was aware of the risks involved with the surgery. The ultimate risk was that my retina became damaged which would lead to complete blindness in my eye. Still it doesn't stop the feeling of disappointment and frustration. I am trying to just get on with things and make the most of what I can see and can do. I'm using the Dragon text software again to write this blog entry, where I just dictate and it types everything for me. I've also looked into the access technology on my iPhone and iPod at and I need to make more use of that.

I have sent a message to my consultant and hopefully I will hear from him shortly about what can be done to correct it this time. The doctor at accident and emergency said that the only real option would be surgery but as I have only just had surgery on my I it may be a while until they can operate again. I also need to know how likely it is that this will just happen again. Hopefully there should be a procedure which can remove more of the lens debris but I won't know until I have spoken to the consultant.

I'm trying to look on the bright side and be positive about it all but it may take me a while to get used to it. What is worse is not knowing what can be done right now. I wish I had happier news to report.

Garden update 11 Jun 2011

Garden 11 Jun 2011, a set on Flickr.

I've taken a few more pictures of my garden. click on the title or any of the photos and it will take you to my flickr page.

The mustard is a plant bees love which is why I planted it as part of a wild flower batch of seeds. Obviously the mustard is rather robust and has taken over the whole tub!

Baking

Above is a picture of the bread rolls I baked during the week. It was my first ever attempt at baking bread. They turned out ok though they look a bit misshapen! I wanted long rolls for sausages! They were also very crusty because I brushed them with boiling water before popping them in the oven.

Today I decided to make a loaf, using the same recipe as before. As you can see my loaf came out ok! We had the first warm slices with some home made chicken and vegetable soup.

Catch up!

I meant to write this entry back in May!

I met up with my friend Ruth back in May in London on a Sunday. We decided to go to Covent Garden, where I've not been for ages. We got there before 12 so it was relatively quiet for that part of London. Below is a picture of the band who were playing a mixture of lively folk tunes and classical. They're pictured below dancing to one of their folk tunes.

The picture below is one of the indoor market at Covent Garden, the band are by the stairs.
It was a really lovely day spent around Covent Garden. We went to the Victoria market on the opposite side of Covent Garden where I picked up some bargains including a lovely glass necklace.

We had lunch at Cafe Rouge and spent some time mooching around Waterstones. In Waterstones I came across a book by Karen Maitland called Company of Liars. I didn't buy it but when I got home I downloaded it for my kindle. I read it in a few days and found it incredibly haunting. Its set in 14th Century Britain during the first outbreak of the plague. The characters in the book are travelling away from the outbreaks across England. It wasn't the most historically accurate nor the best written book I've ever read (by a long shot,) but it was fascinating and I couldn't put it down!

From Company of Liars I came across a book on Amazon called a Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness which is one of the silliest and frothiest books I've read in a long time but I couldn't put it down. Here's a good piece in the guardian about the book. It was the perfect piece of escapism to read whilst I was waiting for my op in hospital and recovering!